Seeing as it’s Hallowe’en, I thought I’d share a wee story with you. I wrote it a while ago and have tried to have it published on a few occasions with no success. Enjoy!
There’s a monster in the cupboard and a werewolf over there
A vampire in the wardrobe and a ghost beneath the stairs
Lots of different beasties live beneath my bed
Are these demons really real or live inside my head?
I have a little problem, I cannot get to sleep
It’s no ordinary problem and it’s proving hard to beat
Every time I close my eyes, fierce monsters fill the room
I only want to get to sleep, I’m hoping that it’s soon
There’s a monster in the cupboard and a werewolf over there
A vampire in the wardrobe and a ghost beneath the stairs
Lots of different beasties live beneath my bed
Are these demons really real or live inside my head?
My parents don’t believe me, “This is silly!” they will say
“Monsters? Don’t talk nonsense!” then they send me on my way
But to me the creatures live here, in shadows long and deep
I wish that they would go away and leave me to my sleep
There’s a monster in the cupboard and a werewolf over there
A vampire in the wardrobe and a ghost beneath the stairs
Lots of different beasties live beneath my bed
Are these demons really real or live inside my head?
So I’ll have to make this better, I’ll do this on my own
I’ll show these beasties who’s the boss. I’ll stop their howls and moans
I know that deep inside my mind, I’m dreaming all this up
Its up to me to train my brain and make the whole thing stop
I need a plan to chase away the creatures and their scares
How about a fiendish troll in just his underwear?
Monsters aren’t scary! I’m starting to believe!
A beastie gets embarrassed, just like you and just like me
I want to think these creatures don’t howl or bite or scream
If I think of them doing normal things, perhaps they’ll leave my dreams
The vampire’s at a wedding in a silly looking suit
His parents made him wear it and they think he looks so cute
The shirt is really itchy, it makes him stress and fret
The tie is also far too tight and chokes him round his neck
The werewolf’s getting told off for eating with her paws
There’s spaghetti on her fingers and her fur is full of sauce
She’s not a baby anymore and must eat properly
Her dad is very angry shouting “Use your cutlery!”’
The ghost is doing his homework, he’s learning how to spell
But is struggling with some harder words and will have to ask for help
He’s not a spooky spectre when he finds it tough to read
Not so much a ghastly ghoul, he’s simply just like me
Now the monster isn’t scary, the vampire’s lost his bite
The ghost is getting paler and the werewolf needs a fright
The beasties are just babies, I’ve made the demons dance
The creatures are a comfort and the troll’s in just his pants
So maybe you are like me, you’ve got monsters in the bed
Those fiery eyes that burn so bright, a thousand shades of red
The fear it seems to grab you and dance and grow and spread
Then please remember these five words –
IT’S ALL INSIDE YOUR HEAD!!
The Littlest Hobo 